Modern parents are changing the conventional rules of parenting. They are saying yes to the experiences that were once a big “No” for children and teens. Sleepovers is one such activity. A night with friends, movies, games, snacks is now being considered a normal part of children’s life nowadays. But not everyone agrees. Recently, a parenting coach, Riddhi Deorah, shared her standpoint on sleepovers. In a recent post, Deorah shared that she does not allow her own child to attend sleepovers, despite repeated requests. She believes parents should think twice before saying yes. “Call me uncool but I do NOT allow my child to have sleepovers (No matter how much he insists),” says Riddhi. She adds that there are 3 reasons for it.
14 Jul 2026 | 16:51
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“Children often don’t know how to react when something feels uncomfortable”
The first reason, according to Deorah, is that many children are not yet equipped to respond appropriately when they find themselves in an uncomfortable situation. “Children often don’t know how to react when something feels uncomfortable. We tell our kids to never make a ‘scene’ in public. But what we don’t realize is that they apply the same advice to even situations where they must raise their voice,” she explained.She adds that when children are away from their parents, they may hesitate to speak up because they are worried about offending others. “When children are away from their parents… they often worry about being rude, upsetting others, making things awkward. Which means they may stay silent just to fit in.” According to Deorah, this tendency to prioritise politeness over personal safety is something parents need to recognise before allowing overnight stays.
“Trusting your child isn’t enough.”
Deorah’s second concern has little to do with whether parents trust their own children. Instead, she says safety also depends on factors that parents cannot always control. “Trusting your child isn’t enough. Because safety isn’t only about your child. It’s also about the environment, the guests you don’t know are there and the situations nobody planned for.” Her point is that even well-intentioned families cannot predict every circumstance that may arise during a sleepover.
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Freedom should depend on readiness, not age
For Deorah, the decision is not about setting a fixed age at which sleepovers become acceptable. Instead, she believes children should first develop specific life skills. “Freedom should follow readiness. Not age. Before children spend the night away from home, they should know: how to trust their instincts, how to set boundaries, how to ask for help and how to leave a situation that feels wrong.” She argues that these abilities are far more important than simply reaching a particular birthday.
One question every parent should ask
The parenting coach also encourages parents to pause and ask themselves one simple but important question before agreeing to a sleepover. “If my child felt uncomfortable tonight… would they know exactly what to do? Many children don’t. Yet.” For her, the answer to that question should guide the decision more than social expectations or peer pressure.
“This isn’t about fear. It’s about preparation.”
While acknowledging that her opinion may not be popular, Deorah insists her approach is not rooted in fear.“This isn’t about fear. It’s about preparation. Because confidence isn’t: ‘My child would never face a difficult situation.’ Confidence is: ‘My child knows what to do if they do.’”Rather than framing the decision as one driven by fear, Deorah says it is about ensuring children are truly prepared before they spend the night away from home. What do you think of her choice? Share you thoughts in the comments.
