“What did you learn at school today?” “Nothing.” For many parents, this exchange is almost a daily ritual. You ask because you genuinely want to know what happened during those several hours your child spent away from you. They answer with one word, shrug, or sometimes simply walk away.Even Prince William appears to know the feeling.
28 Jul 2026 | 16:22
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According to Hello!, during a school visit in Liverpool, the Prince of Wales was asked what his children- Prince George, Princess Charlotte and Prince Louis- learn at school. His response was remarkably relatable: they “always say absolutely nothing at all.”Many parents relate to what Prince William is facing- and this familiar response can also be frustrating. Are children deliberately shutting parents out? Are they uninterested in sharing? Or is there another reason children often struggle to turn an entire school day into a conversation?
Why “How was school?” often gets you nowhere
One reason may be that the question is simply too broad. A child has potentially spent six or seven hours moving between lessons, conversations, friendships, disagreements, activities and small moments that may have seemed important at the time. Asking them to summarise all of that in one answer can be surprisingly difficult.For younger children, there is also a developmental element. They may not yet have the ability to organise a long sequence of events and decide which details are worth telling someone else.Older children have a different problem: they may know exactly what happened but simply may not feel like discussing it at that particular moment. That distinction matters.A quiet response does not automatically mean a child has something to hide.
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Sometimes, children need a little distance before they talk
Parents often want to talk the moment their child walks through the door. After all, this is the first opportunity to find out how the day went. But children don’t necessarily experience that moment in the same way.After several hours of concentrating, following instructions, navigating friendships and managing emotions, some children may simply want to decompress.This can become particularly noticeable during the tween and teenage years, when children are developing greater independence and increasingly turning toward friends and their own internal world.In other words, a child who doesn’t talk immediately isn’t necessarily a child who won’t talk at all.
The bigger issue: Do they feel safe telling you things?
This is where parents may want to look beyond the daily “How was school?” ritual. Children are more likely to share difficult experiences when they expect their parents to listen rather than immediately judge, lecture or solve the problem. This doesn’t mean parents should never ask questions. It means the conversation shouldn’t feel like an investigation. If every answer is followed by another question, correction or warning- “Why did you do that?”, “You shouldn’t have said that”, “Did you finish your homework?”- a child can quickly learn that talking comes with consequences.Over time, that can make silence feel easier.
So, what should parents do instead?
The answer isn’t to interrogate children more effectively. It may be to make conversations easier to enter. Instead of repeatedly asking, “How was school?”, try something more specific:
- “What was the funniest thing that happened today?”
- “Who did you sit with at lunch?”
- “Was there anything that annoyed you today?”
- “What was the easiest thing you did?”
- “Did anything surprise you?”
These questions give children somewhere to start. But even then, don’t expect a full conversation every time. A child may answer one question and stop. That’s okay.
Pay attention to the little openings
Children don’t always announce that they are ready to talk. Sometimes the conversation begins while you’re driving. Sometimes it happens while making dinner, walking the dog, folding laundry or lying beside them at bedtime. And sometimes the thing they finally tell you has nothing to do with the question you asked. That is why creating regular, low-pressure opportunities for conversation can be more useful than demanding a daily report.A 2024 longitudinal study published in JAMA Network Open found associations between perceived parental digital interruptions and later attention and hyperactivity symptoms among emerging adolescents, while also showing that children’s own difficulties can influence how much parental technoference they perceive. The researchers emphasised the complexity of the relationship rather than suggesting a simple one-way effect.That complexity is worth remembering in everyday parenting too.A child who says “nothing” isn’t necessarily rejecting a parent. They may be tired, distracted, processing something privately—or simply not have anything they want to share yet.
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When “nothing” deserves a closer look
There is, however, a difference between an ordinary reluctance to discuss school and a sudden, persistent change in behaviour.If a child who was previously communicative suddenly becomes unusually withdrawn, starts avoiding school, experiences significant changes in sleep or appetite, becomes fearful about attending school, or repeatedly appears distressed after school, parents may want to look more closely at what is happening.In such situations, the goal shouldn’t be to force a confession. A calm conversation with the child, teacher or school counsellor may provide a better picture. For most families, though, the occasional “nothing” is just that: nothing. Even a future king can’t necessarily get a detailed school report out of his children.And perhaps that’s a useful reminder for the rest of us. Parenting isn’t about getting every answer on demand. Sometimes, it’s about making sure your child knows that when they are ready to talk, you’re there to listen.
