“We don’t lie to our children about money”: Ankur Warikoo and his wife share 3 important parenting rules for raising independent children

Ankur Warikoo and his wife Ruchi.

Parenting is often about the small decisions that repeat every day: whether to buy the toy a child is demanding, whether to step in when they are struggling, or how parents behave when they disagree with each other.Entrepreneur and content creator Ankur Warikoo and his wife have a simple approach to these situations. In a recent Instagram video on Ankur’s page, the couple, who have two children aged 15 and 9, shared three rules they consider important in raising their children.

And while these rules may sound like everyday parenting choices, each one addresses a skill children eventually need to manage life on their own.

“We don’t lie to them about money”

The first rule the couple spoke about was money. Warikoo said they don’t tell their children that they are poor or that they cannot afford something when the real reason for saying no is that the family simply doesn’t need it.Instead, they explain the difference between wanting something and actually needing it. “If you want to buy this thing by looking at other children and you don’t want to buy it because of your greed, that is not the reason to buy something,” he said in the video.The underlying lesson is important for children growing up in a world where comparison is almost impossible to escape. A child may see a classmate with the latest phone, expensive shoes, a new gaming console or a holiday abroad and immediately feel that they need the same thing.But saying “We can’t afford it” every time may not always teach the child what parents actually want them to understand. There is a difference between financial inability and financial choice. It also introduces an important adult concept early: having money does not mean you have to spend it.

“We don’t overprotect them”

Ankur Warikoo and his wife Ruchi Warikoo.

The couple’s second rule is about independence. Warikoo said that when their children face a problem, they don’t immediately step in and solve it for them. “If you are getting bored, then leave it. Figure it out by yourself,” he said.The idea is not to leave children unsupported. It is to allow them to experience manageable problems without immediately removing the discomfort. A child who cannot solve a puzzle does not necessarily need the parent to solve it. A teenager who has an argument with a friend may not need the parent to immediately call the friend’s parent. A child who is bored may not need a phone handed to them.There is an important distinction between being available to a child and constantly rescuing them. Overprotective parenting can sometimes send an unintended message: You cannot handle this without me.

“They will see us fight, but never see us disrespect each other”

The third rule may be the most powerful one. Warikoo said his children will see their parents disagree or fight, but they will not see them disrespect each other. “Disagreement is acceptable, but disrespect is not acceptable,” he said.This distinction matters because children don’t learn about relationships only through conversations with their parents. They also learn by watching how adults behave. Parents may tell children to speak politely, control their anger and respect others. But children also notice how their parents speak to each other when they are angry.

What Indian parents can actually take from these three rules

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The interesting part of Warikoo and his wife’s approach is that none of the three rules requires expensive parenting techniques, special classes or complicated schedules. They are habits that can be built into ordinary family life.Stop using “We can’t afford it” as the automatic answerIf the real answer is “We don’t think it is necessary,” say that. For younger children, parents can explain: “We have decided not to spend money on this.” “You already have something similar.” “Let’s save this money for something you will use more.” “You can choose between this and something else you really want.”This gradually helps children understand needs, wants, choices and priorities.Give children some problems to solve themselvesBefore jumping in, ask: “What do you think you can do?” If a child is stuck, give them a hint rather than the complete answer. If they are bored, don’t immediately reach for a screen. If a teenager forgets something that was their responsibility, let them experience a reasonable consequence.The question parents can ask themselves is: “Does my child actually need my help, or am I uncomfortable watching them struggle?” That one question can change a lot.Teach money through everyday decisionsParents don’t necessarily need a formal “money lesson”. Take children grocery shopping and explain why one product is chosen over another. Give older children a fixed amount for a particular purpose and allow them to decide how to use it. Talk about saving before a major purchase. Explain that advertisements and social media are designed to make people want things.The aim isn’t to make children anxious about money. It is to make them comfortable talking about it.Give freedom gradually, not suddenlyIndependence doesn’t have to arrive when a child turns 18. A 9-year-old can decide how to organise their school bag. A 12-year-old can manage a small allowance. A teenager can plan parts of a family outing, manage certain responsibilities or make decisions about how they use their time. Parents can gradually increase freedom as children demonstrate responsibility.Perhaps the most useful takeaway from the couple’s approach is therefore not any individual rule. It is the idea that parents are not only raising children who need to be cared for today. They are raising adults who will eventually have to manage money, solve problems and build relationships on their own.